Both Val and Vel shot up in their seats and started shouting at the same time.
"Are you kidding??"
"Your EX? Voxy--"
"Why did HE agree to come at all? The fuck? Did he come asking for help and you folded immediately?"
"What happened to fucking him, baby? Well. Fucking him up."
"No no no, this is bullshit - why the fuck did you make this decision without us? Did he get one over on you, are you Deal bound? You know we'll fuck him up and his ugly ass haircut."
The response caught him by surprise, enough that he paused and ogled between the two of them. In the pit of his stomach, there was a twist akin to... shame? No.
Later, he would come to understand that he was feeling rather touched by the outrage. Like Alastor had done something to fool him. ...Again.
Though Vox was certain there was something he was missing, it... wasn't about him anymore. At the center of it all, it wasn't about either of them.
"I-... no, I didn't- I didn't fold, and I'm not bound by any Deal! Not like what you're thinking." Funny that Valentino would be more on the mark, though.
He could just say it. But it was something that never happened, couldn't happen. But he had proof that, somehow, the impossible had become possible. Vox sighed and finally took a seat opposite of them. He needed a moment to compose himself, claws drumming on the countertop.
"The point is, he can't be seen for a while." There was no putting the cat back out of the bag once he took the step, but they deserved to know. He conjured a small square of light, swept a finger against it, and blew it up into a full-sized screen upon the table: A digital copy of the ultrasound pictures.
He pointedly averted his eyes from the image, or he would be caught staring. "We spent a night together. And now... he's got something a whole lot of Sinners in Hell would literally kill to get their hands on."
The two were dead silent for a beat, both pairs of glowing red eyes growing wide as they laid their gazes on the ultrasound. A moment to process, to even understand what they're LOOKING at.
It's Valentino who breaks the silence.
"Oh, Papi, you finally got to fuck that pendejo," he cooed excitedly, leaning in with a smirk, "If you wanted to make a baby, Voxy, you and I should've tried harder."
"Oh my god, that is NOT the point. Vox, that can't possibly be real, this isn't even a funny deep fake."
The longer the silence held, the more Vox felt the jitters. It was something he kept between Alastor and himself, and letting more people into the fold was so risky... but this was Velvette and Valentino. They'd have found out eventually, and keeping it from them would have been considerably worse.
Val, you're not helping. You would be absolutely adorable knocked up, but you wouldn't ever be subtle about it-
"I thought he was pulling my leg when he told me, too. But he took tests, Velvette. He's been checked out a number of times by a physician whose brain I've been scrambling for weeks to maintain silence." He realized he was drumming his claws again, and curled his hands into fists.
"The princess would ask questions. Any kid of mine, let alone Alastor's, is too valuable for some opportunistic, slimy FUCK-" He'd slammed a fist on the counter top, and his left eye blazed. "To not try and swoop in for a power grab. So that renovated floor is now his."
He closed his eyes.
"...And that's the project I've been keeping under wraps. My intent was to let the two of you know, but I confess I got a little... carried away, haha... ahem."
"So-- how and when did you bury that seventy year hatchet?" Velvette asked, still blown away. The idea of Vox ending up a dad-- "Also I am not helping with a fuckin' baby, I cut that shit out of me when I was alive too."
"I had a feeling that once they fucked they'd work through their anger. Was it kinky~? Baby, you knocked up the strongest demon in hell... that'll make a fun porno plot."
"How, is my question - thousands of years and no one else broke that stupid curse either on purpose or by accident. What's the X factor you or fuckass-bob have, here..." Velvette scrutinized, staring at the screen and tapping her bottom lip in thought.
"Are you suuuuure you don't want to film him? We could hold off making the edits until after the little niño is already born."
"Val, it's still the Radio Demon, that old fuck won't let you anywhere near him."
"The hatchet's not buried!! ...And you don't need to do anything for a baby. I'll handle it. Things are just... different right now." And that's his story.
"He's always been an oddball even for a Sinner. To be honest, I shouldn't be surprised he'd have some way around that curse." He seriously couldn't believe he was working to keep the rut under wraps, but you're welcome.
"You remember he can scramble video if he wanted, right? Good luck getting your porno... even if that IS a good idea." Fuck, he needed a drink. He'll send a ping for one of those creepy-ass Fizzies to bring him something. He needed to quit smoking, but surely he could still have drinks, right...?
You REEK of bourbon. He could hear it now. You're killing him, Al.
"Babes. This is still crazy, you know that, right? You can't exactly maintain the same city-power-grid-leveling murderous vengeance when you've got the guy waddling around like a penguin," Velvette countered, not buying the idea that things hadn't so obviously changed without their knowing.
"And-- how long are we on information lockdown? It's not like a newborn is exactly resilient. We're going to be protecting that kid for probably their whole lives." Not that Velvette really begrudged the kid that, obviously nothing to do about that shit.
"Oh, truuuuue... well, there's enough of us we can handle it," Valentino hummed in thought, digging through his pockets - ah hah! He pulled a cigarette out, offering it to Vox. "We'll get the cigars later, this'll have to do for now."
Okay, not going to lie, the waddling mental image was enough to amuse a small twitch of a smile out of him. But he quickly refreshed his screen.
"Look, the murderous vengeance is just on hold right now. I have zero doubt it'll go right back to what it always was after the kid is born." Yet he still had his mind wander to when his head was turned in the lift; the 'demonstration' on the couch. How could he have more of that...?
"Easy- I've patented security that beats the shit out of anything even earth has to offer! They'll be the most well-protected little bastard in all three worlds."
The offered cigarette was quietly waved off. But that reminded him...
"Hey, random question: Do I smell like smoke? Like, is it obvious?"
"Vox, the whole tower smells like smoke. Val's and the regular kind," Velvette shrugged. Honestly, the air circulation probably just rotated everyone's smoke in a diluted constant miasma in here, even with how Vox fusses about the filters. "Plus, we film porn here and Valentino goes on literal tears for whichever unlucky bitch is going to be the day's new Stretch Armstrong. Point is, this place ain't exactly kid friendly."
"Hey! I can keep my whores in line, no one's going to fuck with the niño. Especially not with daddy right around the corner~"
"Hm. Good point." So maybe he just had a smell of lingering smoke through the tower. But Velvette had a good point. Already, he was setting up an assessment of the filtration systems. They needed souping up, and there was a merciful, MERCIFUL new project he could busy himself with to settle his daddy jitters.
"Exactly, Val! Glad we're on the same page," he noted with the slightest lilt of a purr. He closed the panel and opened a new one with tower schematics. He needed a moment to look things over...
Tap, tap, tap on the counter.
"Velvette, can you send over the data on your Love Potion formulation? Specifically how you handle the distillation process. I have to wonder about second-hand effects, but first I want to wrap my head around the properties of Valentino's smoke. And..."
He flopped back in his chair. "...Guess I'm going on gum and patches or something on the tobacco for a while. That's gonna be fun."
"Ohh, he's so sexy when he's serious," Valentino teased, biting his lower lip in amusement. Velvette was still actually thinking about all of this - and all of the implications.
"...So, like... how much of this is your white boy 'I have an heir' shit, how much is 'I'm the shit for doing something impossible', and how much is it 'I'm gonna be a dad'? I never pegged you for an actual parental type."
That... was a bunch of good questions, really. In the rush of the renovations and having done far more talking with Alastor over the months rather than rushing right into scrapping like they'd done for decades, he never really sat and stewed over where these feelings were coming from.
Was he excited? Absolutely. Scared? Shitless. But for all of his thinking ahead, his climbing, mind set on the future- so as not to be left behind as the times swiftly changed, obviously- where did he see himself in connection to all of this? In the middle of the 'I'll show him I'm not an idiot', 'I'll prove that wasn't a waste of time', 'I'll make you regret what you'd told me that night 70 years ago', 'I'll show everyone just how good I am at THIS, too', he was thinking back more and more to those times he spent with his own father.
But it was the 50s. There were expectations a pop had for their son. While they did have some amicable times, there was that unspoken oath to not be a slacker and work hard, always move your way on up. Be responsible- boy oh BOY would his mother have given him the riot act for all of this...
But living for almost 100 years, experiencing plenty of movies, stories of how the times have changed steadily and even seeing how the hellborn function in their family units, it was... nice. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he sort of wanted something like that, too.
And weren't you supposed to always be better than your parents? He certainly was better than his by a long shot.
"Oh, Vel...! I'm leaving the 'legacy' and 'heirs' crap to those Goetia! They can enjoy their little Middle Ages foibles." He waggled his fingers dismissively.
"But how can it NOT be column B and C? We haven't seen anything like this since Lilith! The first Sinner! We're going in the fucking HISTORY books! And... sure, I didn't exactly have any little bundles when I was alive..."
He sat up straighter. "BUT! But...! Imagine the bolstered support! I go from VoxTek Hot Shot to New Dad, and the family-minded demographic number skyrockets! Those 'why offer a thing when you've got no stake in it' naysayers can officially shut the fuck up!"
The people had been bitching for better car seats and buggies, right? Why buy from some random hack when you could instead buy from someone with a kid that you can trust?
"We're not exactly 'family friendly' here, Vee. Milking a bunch of dumb bimbos is sort of the business model," Velvette rolled her eyes. "So - what, you're having some hellish miracle demon baby like the annoying as fuck princess? Aren't we going to fuck up that kid?"
"Chiquita, baby, whores on earth had babies aaaaall the time. Half of them became whores to afford those babies, even. Bebé is going to be born here in Hell, they're gonna be our twisted little bastard no matter what, and we'll adore them~" Valentino chuckled, lighting the cigarette that had been refused and taking a puff to spread that red mist of his like an engine letting off steam.
"You're being surprisingly chill about this. I figured you'd throw the biggest tantrum about it in jealousy."
Yeah, Val, are you secretly down bad in a family way and want to share with the class or something? But hey, he wasn't in the mood to deal with a tantrum when things were already happening.
But Vox laughed, crossed his arms behind his head. "How hard can it be to raise a kid? I mean, my parents weren't winning any awards or anything and I turned out fine!"
"Babe. I'm going to throw the rock in this glass house: you were a serial killer and you spiraled so hard you fucked up and died," Velvette GESTURED at Vox. At all of him. "Babies scream and cry and shit. Kids are little hyperactive weirdos. By the time they're grown, they're going to be fucked up. Hopefully only mentally, if we can keep fuckers on the streets from shanking 'em."
So much bullshit. So, so much shit to worry about and neither of these dumbass men are taking it seriously.
"And you're sure Alastor's just gonna squeeze it out and bail? Why do you like this fucker, again?"
Whether or not the words were going in one ear and out the other was anybody's guess. But his gaze diverted, perhaps thoughtfully, with the last.
"He can bail or choose to stay. I don't give a shit," he replied breezily, even if he felt a sharp twist in his stomach. The truth was... complicated, but that was on a need-to-know basis.
"Regardless, it was a mutual decision not to put an end to it, so we've got the better part of several months to figure things out. In the meantime, all I can do is ask that you both trust me on this. Neither of you are required to do anything; I'm not roping you into anything other than keeping quiet about the whole thing- Alastor, the baby, the whole nine yards."
He rolled his shoulders, and once that Fizzbot rolled in with a tray of drinks, Vox was happy to take one of them.
"Besides... if fuck-ups like the Morningstars can stumble their way into raising a kid to adulthood, I can pull it off and better."
He propped his chin in his free hand with a grin. "Now, now...! I wouldn't dream of leaving you on babysitting duty. I don't need a second voice judging my tastes or their first word being 'pissbaby'. One of you is plenty."
He turned his gaze to Valentino. "As for you, Val- if you promise not to take them with you to any of your shoots or let your actresses so much as lay a hand on them... we'll discuss it later."
Ah, right--
"So! With all of that covered, if you feel like pestering Alastor, it's out of my hands, but... uh..." Claw drumming. Fidgeting. He caught himself this time, and pointedly stopped. "Maybe curb the smoke. I think I remember reading something about pregnancy coming with a sharper sense of smell. Guy was able to pick up the cigarette I'd had and showered off the night before. Either that, or I need to fire my dry-cleaners."
A beat. "And no touching! ...Hah- He's not a touchy guy, okay? I'm serious. It's always been a thing with him."
"'The hatchet's not buried'," Velvette repeated in a mocking tone, getting a little confident snicker from Valentino.
"I won't touch your toy, Cariño~" Valentino purred, long drooling tongue playfully licking at his bottom lip, "Who knew that the Radio Demon was just like a stray cat - needed to be bred so he calmed down~? How was he, by the way-- can we film the next time you two--?"
"That's my cue to fuck off, then. At least I'll get to dress the fucker, maybe he'll even let me fix that fucking mess of a hairdo."
His expression fell with the snicker. ...Goddamn it. They were still adversaries, certainly! A temporary ceasefire!
An adversary that, with that word going around, had him brighten and nearly choke on his next drink as the memory of that night flit to mind. The sounds he'd made, the way he twisted around and those sharp teeth dug into his flesh, legs wrapped around- He lifted the back of his hand to his mouth to catch a bit of the whiskey that dribbled down as he coughed and fought to take in air for the moment.
Who was he to kiss and tell, anyway!? Even if it was fucking incredible-
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divinetree2025-10-07 08:11 pm
no subject
"Are you kidding??"
"Your EX? Voxy--"
"Why did HE agree to come at all? The fuck? Did he come asking for help and you folded immediately?"
"What happened to fucking him, baby? Well. Fucking him up."
"No no no, this is bullshit - why the fuck did you make this decision without us? Did he get one over on you, are you Deal bound? You know we'll fuck him up and his ugly ass haircut."
no subject
Later, he would come to understand that he was feeling rather touched by the outrage. Like Alastor had done something to fool him. ...Again.
Though Vox was certain there was something he was missing, it... wasn't about him anymore. At the center of it all, it wasn't about either of them.
"I-... no, I didn't- I didn't fold, and I'm not bound by any Deal! Not like what you're thinking." Funny that Valentino would be more on the mark, though.
He could just say it. But it was something that never happened, couldn't happen. But he had proof that, somehow, the impossible had become possible. Vox sighed and finally took a seat opposite of them. He needed a moment to compose himself, claws drumming on the countertop.
"The point is, he can't be seen for a while." There was no putting the cat back out of the bag once he took the step, but they deserved to know. He conjured a small square of light, swept a finger against it, and blew it up into a full-sized screen upon the table: A digital copy of the ultrasound pictures.
He pointedly averted his eyes from the image, or he would be caught staring. "We spent a night together. And now... he's got something a whole lot of Sinners in Hell would literally kill to get their hands on."
no subject
It's Valentino who breaks the silence.
"Oh, Papi, you finally got to fuck that pendejo," he cooed excitedly, leaning in with a smirk, "If you wanted to make a baby, Voxy, you and I should've tried harder."
"Oh my god, that is NOT the point. Vox, that can't possibly be real, this isn't even a funny deep fake."
no subject
Val, you're not helping. You would be absolutely adorable knocked up, but you wouldn't ever be subtle about it-
"I thought he was pulling my leg when he told me, too. But he took tests, Velvette. He's been checked out a number of times by a physician whose brain I've been scrambling for weeks to maintain silence." He realized he was drumming his claws again, and curled his hands into fists.
"The princess would ask questions. Any kid of mine, let alone Alastor's, is too valuable for some opportunistic, slimy FUCK-" He'd slammed a fist on the counter top, and his left eye blazed. "To not try and swoop in for a power grab. So that renovated floor is now his."
He closed his eyes.
"...And that's the project I've been keeping under wraps. My intent was to let the two of you know, but I confess I got a little... carried away, haha... ahem."
no subject
"I had a feeling that once they fucked they'd work through their anger. Was it kinky~? Baby, you knocked up the strongest demon in hell... that'll make a fun porno plot."
"How, is my question - thousands of years and no one else broke that stupid curse either on purpose or by accident. What's the X factor you or fuckass-bob have, here..." Velvette scrutinized, staring at the screen and tapping her bottom lip in thought.
"Are you suuuuure you don't want to film him? We could hold off making the edits until after the little niño is already born."
"Val, it's still the Radio Demon, that old fuck won't let you anywhere near him."
no subject
"He's always been an oddball even for a Sinner. To be honest, I shouldn't be surprised he'd have some way around that curse." He seriously couldn't believe he was working to keep the rut under wraps, but you're welcome.
"You remember he can scramble video if he wanted, right? Good luck getting your porno... even if that IS a good idea." Fuck, he needed a drink. He'll send a ping for one of those creepy-ass Fizzies to bring him something. He needed to quit smoking, but surely he could still have drinks, right...?
You REEK of bourbon. He could hear it now. You're killing him, Al.
no subject
"And-- how long are we on information lockdown? It's not like a newborn is exactly resilient. We're going to be protecting that kid for probably their whole lives." Not that Velvette really begrudged the kid that, obviously nothing to do about that shit.
"Oh, truuuuue... well, there's enough of us we can handle it," Valentino hummed in thought, digging through his pockets - ah hah! He pulled a cigarette out, offering it to Vox. "We'll get the cigars later, this'll have to do for now."
no subject
"Look, the murderous vengeance is just on hold right now. I have zero doubt it'll go right back to what it always was after the kid is born." Yet he still had his mind wander to when his head was turned in the lift; the 'demonstration' on the couch. How could he have more of that...?
"Easy- I've patented security that beats the shit out of anything even earth has to offer! They'll be the most well-protected little bastard in all three worlds."
The offered cigarette was quietly waved off. But that reminded him...
"Hey, random question: Do I smell like smoke? Like, is it obvious?"
no subject
"Hey! I can keep my whores in line, no one's going to fuck with the niño. Especially not with daddy right around the corner~"
no subject
"Exactly, Val! Glad we're on the same page," he noted with the slightest lilt of a purr. He closed the panel and opened a new one with tower schematics. He needed a moment to look things over...
Tap, tap, tap on the counter.
"Velvette, can you send over the data on your Love Potion formulation? Specifically how you handle the distillation process. I have to wonder about second-hand effects, but first I want to wrap my head around the properties of Valentino's smoke. And..."
He flopped back in his chair. "...Guess I'm going on gum and patches or something on the tobacco for a while. That's gonna be fun."
no subject
"...So, like... how much of this is your white boy 'I have an heir' shit, how much is 'I'm the shit for doing something impossible', and how much is it 'I'm gonna be a dad'? I never pegged you for an actual parental type."
no subject
Was he excited? Absolutely. Scared? Shitless. But for all of his thinking ahead, his climbing, mind set on the future- so as not to be left behind as the times swiftly changed, obviously- where did he see himself in connection to all of this? In the middle of the 'I'll show him I'm not an idiot', 'I'll prove that wasn't a waste of time', 'I'll make you regret what you'd told me that night 70 years ago', 'I'll show everyone just how good I am at THIS, too', he was thinking back more and more to those times he spent with his own father.
But it was the 50s. There were expectations a pop had for their son. While they did have some amicable times, there was that unspoken oath to not be a slacker and work hard, always move your way on up. Be responsible- boy oh BOY would his mother have given him the riot act for all of this...
But living for almost 100 years, experiencing plenty of movies, stories of how the times have changed steadily and even seeing how the hellborn function in their family units, it was... nice. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he sort of wanted something like that, too.
And weren't you supposed to always be better than your parents? He certainly was better than his by a long shot.
"Oh, Vel...! I'm leaving the 'legacy' and 'heirs' crap to those Goetia! They can enjoy their little Middle Ages foibles." He waggled his fingers dismissively.
"But how can it NOT be column B and C? We haven't seen anything like this since Lilith! The first Sinner! We're going in the fucking HISTORY books! And... sure, I didn't exactly have any little bundles when I was alive..."
He sat up straighter. "BUT! But...! Imagine the bolstered support! I go from VoxTek Hot Shot to New Dad, and the family-minded demographic number skyrockets! Those 'why offer a thing when you've got no stake in it' naysayers can officially shut the fuck up!"
The people had been bitching for better car seats and buggies, right? Why buy from some random hack when you could instead buy from someone with a kid that you can trust?
no subject
"Chiquita, baby, whores on earth had babies aaaaall the time. Half of them became whores to afford those babies, even. Bebé is going to be born here in Hell, they're gonna be our twisted little bastard no matter what, and we'll adore them~" Valentino chuckled, lighting the cigarette that had been refused and taking a puff to spread that red mist of his like an engine letting off steam.
"You're being surprisingly chill about this. I figured you'd throw the biggest tantrum about it in jealousy."
"Mean!!"
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But Vox laughed, crossed his arms behind his head. "How hard can it be to raise a kid? I mean, my parents weren't winning any awards or anything and I turned out fine!"
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So much bullshit. So, so much shit to worry about and neither of these dumbass men are taking it seriously.
"And you're sure Alastor's just gonna squeeze it out and bail? Why do you like this fucker, again?"
no subject
"He can bail or choose to stay. I don't give a shit," he replied breezily, even if he felt a sharp twist in his stomach. The truth was... complicated, but that was on a need-to-know basis.
"Regardless, it was a mutual decision not to put an end to it, so we've got the better part of several months to figure things out. In the meantime, all I can do is ask that you both trust me on this. Neither of you are required to do anything; I'm not roping you into anything other than keeping quiet about the whole thing- Alastor, the baby, the whole nine yards."
He rolled his shoulders, and once that Fizzbot rolled in with a tray of drinks, Vox was happy to take one of them.
"Besides... if fuck-ups like the Morningstars can stumble their way into raising a kid to adulthood, I can pull it off and better."
no subject
"I'll flay a motherfucker that fucks with 'em, but that's it. If I give you a fuckin' inch you'll take a mile," Velvette accused.
no subject
He turned his gaze to Valentino. "As for you, Val- if you promise not to take them with you to any of your shoots or let your actresses so much as lay a hand on them... we'll discuss it later."
Ah, right--
"So! With all of that covered, if you feel like pestering Alastor, it's out of my hands, but... uh..." Claw drumming. Fidgeting. He caught himself this time, and pointedly stopped. "Maybe curb the smoke. I think I remember reading something about pregnancy coming with a sharper sense of smell. Guy was able to pick up the cigarette I'd had and showered off the night before. Either that, or I need to fire my dry-cleaners."
A beat. "And no touching! ...Hah- He's not a touchy guy, okay? I'm serious. It's always been a thing with him."
no subject
"I won't touch your toy, Cariño~" Valentino purred, long drooling tongue playfully licking at his bottom lip, "Who knew that the Radio Demon was just like a stray cat - needed to be bred so he calmed down~? How was he, by the way-- can we film the next time you two--?"
"That's my cue to fuck off, then. At least I'll get to dress the fucker, maybe he'll even let me fix that fucking mess of a hairdo."
no subject
An adversary that, with that word going around, had him brighten and nearly choke on his next drink as the memory of that night flit to mind. The sounds he'd made, the way he twisted around and those sharp teeth dug into his flesh, legs wrapped around- He lifted the back of his hand to his mouth to catch a bit of the whiskey that dribbled down as he coughed and fought to take in air for the moment.
Who was he to kiss and tell, anyway!? Even if it was fucking incredible-