Spoiling and pampering was good. Massages... really? He hadn't gone to have a massage in years, and his shoulders already were reminding him of this. Alastor nibbled, made promises. Made it harder to think.
Being called a 'darling doe' made him scoff a bit, but the way his gaze scattered briefly from the deer's face gave away the abashed pleasure. It was fine, shut up, but actually don't, please-
But Alastor had well and truly won the game. Steam visibly rising from his head, the king was left with a good number of dream material and fantasy lingering in the wrinkles of his brain.
And he'll put a cherry on top by tugging Lucifer just a little closer, so that Alastor could press a fond little kiss on Lucifer's shirt, over the naval. Where he promised a fawn will be.
Hohohoh. He'll take that victory. Alastor wrapped his arms around Lucifer and cuddled... his tail would be waggling in delight.
"Of course, if it's a heat this year, you'll be in charge of spoiling me instead," he teased fondly, nuzzling against the man's middle. "But it sounds like we're hoping it's a rut, hmm?"
"All of Hell would see what a trophy you've claimed. How powerful you still are~! And oh hoh, whichever happens first, I just know that dear Charlie is going to squeak in delight and cry at the same time," Alastor laughed, jovial.
"But if the fawns have wings like yours, Cher, you'll have to assure them that their cute little chicken wing phases are perfectly normal and not embarrassing at all."
Charlie would absolutely flip her lid, that's for sure. That'd be a conversation to have, if anything did happen.
But Lucifer started, and tweaked those itty-bitty antennae antlers of his. "What I'll assure them is that they aren't chicken wings and their old man is being an asshole!"
...There it is. That's the word that's been... floating uncertainly between them, after all. Alastor may not understand how or why, but far be it from him to doubt the King knows his own feelings after millennia of existence. And having felt love, and known it, in that time.
Alastor didn't answer, letting his hands rub up and down Lucifer's back instead. He couldn't answer for sure if he felt the same... he felt something. It was similar but decidedly different than how attached he'd felt to his mother. It was different than his fondness for Rosie or Mimzy, or the joy he felt in ruffling the feathers of someone like Angel or Husk. Or Charlie, sometimes.
Moments before in this very conversation, Alastor hadn't really felt averse to the idea of having a child with Lucifer. Was that love? That sort of... comfort, that Alastor wasn't used to feeling. He always figured there was certainty in knowing that if Lucifer truly wished, Alastor would just be obliterated - there's nothing Alastor could offer the King except company and madness. And Lucifer just said he loves him for that.
"Hmm. Come here," Alastor finally hummed, stepping down from the barstool and lifting Lucifer, setting him to his feet. It was there that he pulled the man into a dance, smooth and steady, as the radio nearby crackled to life with a gentle tune.
Taking that back and saying that wasn't what he meant would only be a lie. Taking it back would only be hurtful. But... was it too soon? Was it not the right time to-
You ruined it. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot-
Hmm. Come here. He felt like he'd been grabbed and pulled out of a lake he didn't know he'd started drowning in, enough that there was no struggle when he was lifted. Even with supernatural strength, the king was so... so stupidly light.
His hands fell naturally into place despite his odd, numb feeling. The look he gave was momentarily fretful before he focused on the hem of that tattered red coat, his throat swallowing back the apology for springing that on the other man that fought its hardest to reach his tongue and shape the words.
But he fell into step and allowed himself to listen. In time that awful, scribbly fretting that was scrambling in his head, like so many aimless marks from a trembling hand that wanted to cover up as much as possible and as quickly as possible, just... quieted.
Lucifer couldn't look up again. This was... sweet. God, he really was soft, wasn't he?
"...I haven't... heard this one in a while," he noted quietly, his mouth so damned dry.
"You should leave my station open more often," Alastor teased softly, though there wasn't any tooth in it. Just a quiet fondness, as he gently led a dance that was quiet and calm.
Lucifer loves me.
The thought weighs heavily in his chest, but... it's not an unwelcome feeling. It's... warm. Grounding. It makes the way his mind always frets and betrays quiet, paranoia or violent impulses shushing like they'd laid down to sleep for a while.
Do I love Lucifer?
That's a harder question to answer. Can a creature like him feel love the way normal people do? Is this feeling now what it's supposed to feel like?
"You're far too sweet and patient with me," Alastor remarked. Or maybe the people in Alastor's past were too insistent on answers? Either way, it felt... safer, since Lucifer WAS so patient. Alastor could be slow to come to grips with understanding. "I fret I could scar that frail heart."
He swallowed. Quietly laughed. "I should leave your station open more often. But I do have it on at night in my suite while I'm getting work done. I enjoy your monologues."
The man could read from a phone book and Lucifer would be hooked. Man, remember phone books? More relics of times past, basically like the two of them.
He finally looked up with the remark. "It's not- ...I'm not..."
Finally, he sighed. "Lily was... my only one, for so long. I'm practically inexperienced with all of this. I know you're navigating a lot of things, but... I guess I am, too."
His grip tightened slightly, seeking a lifeline. "It's my fault. No matter what people tell me or try to assure me, it was... it was all me as the weakest link, and I paid dearly for it. I don't want to mess this one up, too."
"Hmm, yes, well..." Alastor squeezed Lucifer's hold in return. He doesn't...
...Yes. He doesn't want to go. Even if he fears he might... he doesn't want to leave.
What a scary thought.
"Whatever failings you had. It was Lilith's decision to answer by leaving. She's Fallen, too, the first human to Fall. Her choices led her there and one cannot imagine she would be so much higher than any other mortal soul," Alastor speculated, keeping them gently swaying. "Blaming oneself is hardly a useful tool - self flagellation is merely a distraction from pursuing what you want in the now. So, Lucifer... what do you want right now?"
What... did he want right now? He was surrounded by things that he enjoyed seeing, and people he enjoyed being around for sure. Could he say 'more of this' without sounding indecisive?
"I..." He shrugged high. "Do you... ever have this sense like, you don't know how and you don't know when, but you just get this feeling that something is going to pull that tablecloth carrying all the things in life that you enjoy and everything will scatter all over the place?"
He eased closer, and instead rest his forehead against Alastor's front. "I want things like this. I want to keep living the life I have right now, in this moment, without feeling like something might be coming that'll just... try and stop it all entirely."
Alastor released a hand from their dancing hold so that he could cradle that head against his chest. His heart was pounding, fluttering as always... it always hurt how hard Lucifer made his heart pound. It was a good pain.
"Mm, that is the way it feels, isn't it?" Alastor agreed quietly. Like a tablecloth about to be swiped away. Rug pulled from beneath their feet. That's exactly how he felt, too, though he was sure he had more reason to expect it. More to fear, more tangible, and he simply couldn't cut the ties or explain the truth.
"I suppose we best be ready to scramble back to our feet if something does. You can't fall away from me so easily~"
Did... did he feel that way, too? But what in Hell would the Radio Demon have to be worried about...?
But to be held like this, dancing like this, was a lovely salve. Ella Fitzgerald was a legend and a wonder.
"I've spent my existence spitting in the eye of everything that's tried to tell me that I can't. It just gets so tiring being creation's scapegoat sometimes. You can only laugh so often at the bile and hatred before you want to give the world an, 'Alright, buddy, it's getting old. Stop that.'"
He tipped his head up a little. "You also couldn't shake me if you tried. I don't drop that word without meaning it... and I intend to say it as much as I'd like."
"Good. Don't let go of me for anything. Even if I bare my teeth," Alastor agreed fondly. "Because I enjoy this. I want to be here."
The exact nature of his emotions are tough to detangle, but if nothing else, he wants to keep this - that can speak for itself, can't it? Even if he'll inevitably feel cornered and bare his teeth. Even if someday he might be forced to try and push away.
Don't give up on him if he tries.
"I've felt somewhat like this before, but... the sense of calm is new. I much prefer hearing you say those words than anyone else."
"I haven't the foggiest," Alastor admitted, sliding his hand back onto Lucifer's shoulder as they swayed. "But inexplicably I find myself much more gentle than I'd dare be to anyone else."
"I see. Now who's the soft one...?" But he grinned, and because he needed it right now, he turned his head and eased his arms around the other's middle.
"Much appreciated, my good man~" Alastor chuckled, hugging him back with a little squeeze. "Far too important to look every part the dangerous Radio Demon outside - but you've already ripped me open and seen my bones and sinew~"
He snickered. God, he was such a freak... but he wouldn't have him any other way.
"And what a privilege and a delight it is. I am truly fortunate."
A smirk. "...Pity we can't say the same for those that'll be entering that labyrinth later. What do you say to some seats at the top of the staircase, get a nice birds-eye view of the chaos when the time comes?"
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sugaronthecream) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
divinetree2024-04-01 08:17 am
no subject
Spoiling and pampering was good. Massages... really? He hadn't gone to have a massage in years, and his shoulders already were reminding him of this. Alastor nibbled, made promises. Made it harder to think.
Being called a 'darling doe' made him scoff a bit, but the way his gaze scattered briefly from the deer's face gave away the abashed pleasure. It was fine, shut up, but actually don't, please-
But Alastor had well and truly won the game. Steam visibly rising from his head, the king was left with a good number of dream material and fantasy lingering in the wrinkles of his brain.
"..."
Thank the man, Lucifer.
"..."
Come on, now.
"Hffgghmgh."
That'll do.
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And he'll put a cherry on top by tugging Lucifer just a little closer, so that Alastor could press a fond little kiss on Lucifer's shirt, over the naval. Where he promised a fawn will be.
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His head fell back, and a plume of the same steam rose from his mouth. Or perhaps that was his soul, who knows...?
You're not fair.
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"Of course, if it's a heat this year, you'll be in charge of spoiling me instead," he teased fondly, nuzzling against the man's middle. "But it sounds like we're hoping it's a rut, hmm?"
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Lucifer took a steadying breath. H...heat...? Ooh, that's right. There was the chance of that, too.
"I told you, Bambi... I'm a switch, remember?" He wound his arms around the other demon's head and tipped to cheekily nip one of those ears.
"A switch and a curse-breaker, so I could very well mark you as mine in a whole new way..."
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"But if the fawns have wings like yours, Cher, you'll have to assure them that their cute little chicken wing phases are perfectly normal and not embarrassing at all."
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But Lucifer started, and tweaked those itty-bitty antennae antlers of his. "What I'll assure them is that they aren't chicken wings and their old man is being an asshole!"
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"Adorable! Precious little chicken wings. More skin for me to kiss gently~"
1/2
But since he had them right there, he swept his hands over the ears and let them spring back into place.
2/2
...
Ah.
Well.
Shit.
1/2
Alastor didn't answer, letting his hands rub up and down Lucifer's back instead. He couldn't answer for sure if he felt the same... he felt something. It was similar but decidedly different than how attached he'd felt to his mother. It was different than his fondness for Rosie or Mimzy, or the joy he felt in ruffling the feathers of someone like Angel or Husk. Or Charlie, sometimes.
Moments before in this very conversation, Alastor hadn't really felt averse to the idea of having a child with Lucifer. Was that love? That sort of... comfort, that Alastor wasn't used to feeling. He always figured there was certainty in knowing that if Lucifer truly wished, Alastor would just be obliterated - there's nothing Alastor could offer the King except company and madness. And Lucifer just said he loves him for that.
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Words failed Alastor, but Jazz never did.
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You ruined it. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot-
Hmm. Come here. He felt like he'd been grabbed and pulled out of a lake he didn't know he'd started drowning in, enough that there was no struggle when he was lifted. Even with supernatural strength, the king was so... so stupidly light.
His hands fell naturally into place despite his odd, numb feeling. The look he gave was momentarily fretful before he focused on the hem of that tattered red coat, his throat swallowing back the apology for springing that on the other man that fought its hardest to reach his tongue and shape the words.
But he fell into step and allowed himself to listen. In time that awful, scribbly fretting that was scrambling in his head, like so many aimless marks from a trembling hand that wanted to cover up as much as possible and as quickly as possible, just... quieted.
Lucifer couldn't look up again. This was... sweet. God, he really was soft, wasn't he?
"...I haven't... heard this one in a while," he noted quietly, his mouth so damned dry.
no subject
Lucifer loves me.
The thought weighs heavily in his chest, but... it's not an unwelcome feeling. It's... warm. Grounding. It makes the way his mind always frets and betrays quiet, paranoia or violent impulses shushing like they'd laid down to sleep for a while.
Do I love Lucifer?
That's a harder question to answer. Can a creature like him feel love the way normal people do? Is this feeling now what it's supposed to feel like?
"You're far too sweet and patient with me," Alastor remarked. Or maybe the people in Alastor's past were too insistent on answers? Either way, it felt... safer, since Lucifer WAS so patient. Alastor could be slow to come to grips with understanding. "I fret I could scar that frail heart."
no subject
The man could read from a phone book and Lucifer would be hooked. Man, remember phone books? More relics of times past, basically like the two of them.
He finally looked up with the remark. "It's not- ...I'm not..."
Finally, he sighed. "Lily was... my only one, for so long. I'm practically inexperienced with all of this. I know you're navigating a lot of things, but... I guess I am, too."
His grip tightened slightly, seeking a lifeline. "It's my fault. No matter what people tell me or try to assure me, it was... it was all me as the weakest link, and I paid dearly for it. I don't want to mess this one up, too."
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...Yes. He doesn't want to go. Even if he fears he might... he doesn't want to leave.
What a scary thought.
"Whatever failings you had. It was Lilith's decision to answer by leaving. She's Fallen, too, the first human to Fall. Her choices led her there and one cannot imagine she would be so much higher than any other mortal soul," Alastor speculated, keeping them gently swaying. "Blaming oneself is hardly a useful tool - self flagellation is merely a distraction from pursuing what you want in the now. So, Lucifer... what do you want right now?"
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"I..." He shrugged high. "Do you... ever have this sense like, you don't know how and you don't know when, but you just get this feeling that something is going to pull that tablecloth carrying all the things in life that you enjoy and everything will scatter all over the place?"
He eased closer, and instead rest his forehead against Alastor's front. "I want things like this. I want to keep living the life I have right now, in this moment, without feeling like something might be coming that'll just... try and stop it all entirely."
no subject
"Mm, that is the way it feels, isn't it?" Alastor agreed quietly. Like a tablecloth about to be swiped away. Rug pulled from beneath their feet. That's exactly how he felt, too, though he was sure he had more reason to expect it. More to fear, more tangible, and he simply couldn't cut the ties or explain the truth.
"I suppose we best be ready to scramble back to our feet if something does. You can't fall away from me so easily~"
no subject
But to be held like this, dancing like this, was a lovely salve. Ella Fitzgerald was a legend and a wonder.
"I've spent my existence spitting in the eye of everything that's tried to tell me that I can't. It just gets so tiring being creation's scapegoat sometimes. You can only laugh so often at the bile and hatred before you want to give the world an, 'Alright, buddy, it's getting old. Stop that.'"
He tipped his head up a little. "You also couldn't shake me if you tried. I don't drop that word without meaning it... and I intend to say it as much as I'd like."
no subject
The exact nature of his emotions are tough to detangle, but if nothing else, he wants to keep this - that can speak for itself, can't it? Even if he'll inevitably feel cornered and bare his teeth. Even if someday he might be forced to try and push away.
Don't give up on him if he tries.
"I've felt somewhat like this before, but... the sense of calm is new. I much prefer hearing you say those words than anyone else."
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With his words, the gaze given to him warmed, the gold of his eyes softening in their glow.
"Intriguing. And how else may I be of service to guard this eye of the storm~?"
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"It's alright. Your secret is safe with me."
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"And what a privilege and a delight it is. I am truly fortunate."
A smirk. "...Pity we can't say the same for those that'll be entering that labyrinth later. What do you say to some seats at the top of the staircase, get a nice birds-eye view of the chaos when the time comes?"
(no subject)