divinetree | It's not that complicated, no matter what they say

Vox blinked at him. So he... liked... his accommodations? Because he was distinctly un-shredded and un-eaten.

He gave a huff of amusement, riding on that mote of relief that fluttered around in his stomach. It joined the butterflies in how his old pal looked in one of his shirts. He was assured that if he ever wore just one of the shirts, god forbid his jacket? There'd be nothing left of his mind.

"Sensible. Waste not, want not."

But a cable of his slipped loose, wrapped around one of Alastor's chair legs and dragged him closer. Maybe it was the thread of getting torn up and eaten. Maybe it was the mental image he had about the shirt or the jacket. Really, it could be both. Yet whatever it was, it was taking the earlier adrenaline and focusing it elsewhere.

"...But the fact of the matter is that you baited me. After all that I've done for you."

He drummed claws against one of the other demon's knees.

"Don't think I'm gonna let that fly once we get back..."

"Oh, Vox, I can't take credit this time - Rosie always preferred things subtle. But you? Oh, you are much too entertaining for me to not bait as loudly as possible. And you fall for it! Every time - because you're easy."

...He's being a little mean. But he can't help it - there's a mirth in his heart anyway, however cold and dead it is, and Al repaid that drumming of fingers with a little tug of those brand new sharp lapels.

...This is quite a nice new outfit. Velvette truly outdid herself.

"Once I'm back, I'm getting a long, soaking bath."

He never could resist the baiting. God, he could never resist the game... call him a fool for it, but who else even grabbed Vox's attention in a death grip like this man did?

His eyes trailed from hands upon the lapels and back up to his face. One set of his claws grasped the back of Alastor's chair as the ones on his knee paused and gave a little drag of the tips.

"...Not before I bite you for the disappearing act..."

As funny as it was to see Vox all riled up, Alastor felt a little twist of annoyance - he'd been ordered around and told where to stand, where to sit, what to do for the past while now. The tension only mounted and boiled over with Rosie pulling the leash.

Without warning, Alastor's hands moved and grasped firmly at the corners of Vox's monitor, seizing control of where that screen was pointed. Seizing control of the momentum.

"No, I don't think you will. But you were promised a reward. Even if now I'm going to punish you by keeping it secret until we're alone again."

Everything stopped. The buzz of static over their near perpetually-shared frequency quieted to a dull rush, and both of his hands remained exactly were they were, moving no further. Cyan pupils sharpened their focus.

"Ha... Figures," he huffed, but the minute trail away from his face to the world beyond reminded him of where they were.

Not here. Not now. Not after everything that's occurred.

Perfect - doing exactly what Alastor wanted. Needed. Pleased as punch, the crankiness vanished in a puff as Alastor giggled and squished his cheek against Vox's screen.

"Good boy! It'll be well worth it."

His screen immediately flushed a brighter blue, caught by the back of the knees by a good boy, and whatever plan he had was gone with a small splutter.

His face shrank a bit and scooted to a corner of the screen away from the squished cheek, if only to give a bit of drama by pouting and looking away.

"You're gonna static up your hair! But who knows? It might be an improvement."

"That was the favorite party trick, back in the day! Ahh... your glass doesn't nearly have the same buzz," Alastor laughed, pulling away and running his hand over the screen.

"...It is an interesting texture, though. Trade one thing for another, I suppose."

It was true that his upgrades did step away from the flaws of his old CRT and even his old boxy dealie from the 50s. As tech upgraded, they became a little more delicate in the wake of electric discharge, so he souped himself up to keep from accidentally frying his own consoles.

However, as Alastor ran a hand over the screen, the pout couldn't last long. There was an impish smirk as sparks danced across the surface in the touch's wake, just a small gift for him. No delicate electronics here... just far more refinement and being in control.

He reached up from the back of the radio demon's chair and hovered the hand nearest his bangs, then an ear. With a small shift, he created the imbalance of natural electric charge, and coaxed the red and black fur to lift and puff.

"Says you. I've still got it," he noted quietly, the picture of quiet amusement.

His hair buzzed, an ear flicked from a slight static-like shock, but Alastor could feel his hair lifting and knew from a few strands clinging to his cheeks that he was all puffed up again. It got a giggle from him - a little nostalgic, a little fun.

Like old times.

"Well, aren't you two cute?" Rosie snickered as she reentered the front of the emporium, holding a bassinet filled with all sorts of goodies. Alastor pouted at her, and Rosie promptly ignored it, bringing the basket and clearing part of the tea table, setting it down.

"Swaddling blankets, some good sturdy diapers, a thermometer, a little bundle of medicines and stuff for their first colds, some stretch cream for you Al - hold on right theeere..." Rosie held up a finger before going to one of her emporium counters, pulling a bottle of gin off of the shelf and magic-ing up a bundled package that smelled quite similar to the roast that Alastor had already eaten. "And there you go! Gin for the proud dad-to-be and some more protein. Now Vox - don't you go breaking hearts all over again! And Alastor, don't be difficult, you know men aren't good at reading into things!"

His attention turned to the flick of the ear and his eyes warmed. That's not something he sees often, even back in the day. But it's the giggle that sends him straight back a good sixty years. ...Enough that the way he joined in the laugh and shrugged a shoulder, wore a lopsided smile, he may as well have had that old CRT on his shoulders again.

Then it all shattered. Startled, Vox turned a brighter shade of blue and grabbed both sides of the seat of his chair, hopped a couple feet further away in one shift and hastily busied his hands with smoothing down his coat.

He focused on the bassinet and goodies instead. "...Ssshit, that's one hell of a care package..."

Wait, breaking hearts, what did she mean? What did Al--

Double wait- was he being called... called stupid-- what the fuck WAS today?? Can he get off this ride?

Rosie chuckled at Vox, giving him a pat on the head - hah, so funny to pat a modern monitor...!

"Lookin' forward to working with you, dear - look after my pet for me, will ya? He's ornery, but he's dedicated. Same will probably go for the little one - come talk to old Rosie if you need something, hmm?"

Alastor, after being mildly miffed at Vox jumping SO far back away from him, rolled his eyes and stood up to take the basket. Rosie didn't bother scolding him - if Vox was a good man, he'd start the fight and insist on carrying the goods.

"That's about it for today! Take care, be discreet going back home~"

He was too numbed to respond much to the pat, his antennae even giving a little bob. Charming! Too good for this moron.

"Uh-... yes, of course! And thank you... for the gifts." He cleared his throat, then stood. The movement would forcibly quench the smoldering coals in his gut over the word 'pet'.

He'll get that figured out. He's got plans. But right now, he just--

"Aha- Nonono-" He swooped in and cradled the basket in his arms. "No dice on the lifting, remember...?"

A cable reached out to get the door as he turned and tipped his hat.

Let's get the HELL out of here.

Alastor's ears pinned, and he grumbled - both at Vox's fussing and at Rosie's amused, knowing smile. Ugh... at the very least, it frees Alastor's hands to retrieve the overcoat he had been using to disguise his figure. Good this happened before much longer...

Agreed. Let's go.

"Toodle-oo, Rosie, my dear - I'll write a letter or two," Alastor bowed just a bit, a formality, and got a curtsy and a little wave in return. They could safely leave Cannibal Town, once Alastor draped one of the innocuous white blankets over the bassinet to disguise it as well. The cannibals in town seem to delightedly wave at Alastor, the ladies charmed by him even as he seemed grouchy - except for Susan, who bitched at him as the two men passed "Boooo, who's that tacky asshole walkin' in here? We don't need TWO chatty media jerks! Booooo! And you're getting fat, Alastor! Boooo!"

Ignore her.

Alastor's not surprised that the limo for the Vees is RIGHT outside of town, and he's grateful... he'll get right into the car, sitting next to Velvette.

The blanket was a fantastic idea. The overcoat was also smart, even if it was getting harder to hide him... but- but that was fine, he had his back-up plans upon back-up plans. It was quite handy, in fact, having his left eye...

In fact, he was tempted when those first ladies waved, a giggle making him quietly huff under his breath. They could wave. Alastor could have all the friends he could ever want. But Vox had to be on the lookout for gossips...

His spine went rigid when some weird old woman was standing by and waving her cane. Tacky? TACKY!? This outfit was one of Velvette's best yet! Who the fuck did she think--

Vox's eyelid twitched when he turned his head to regard Alastor.

I can make it look like an accident. You know I'm good for it...

But it felt like he'd been holding his breath, for when they finally climbed into the car, Vox felt like he could breathe again. He set the covered basket aside as the doors were closed, and he knocked on the window separating the passenger's cabin and the driver's row as he settled in next to Valentino. Let's go home.

"Before anyone asks, we're both fine. That was... weirdly pleasant. But considering how she is during the overlord meetings, I shouldn't be too shocked."

"It would have been much more of a fight if we hadn't already made arrangements," Alastor grumbled, sinking against the seat and running his hands through his hair, scratching at it to alleviate the tension and frustration. "She may not have been interested finding out this way, but if I hadn't done that first, then it'd have been on the table and she would have considered--"

"Hol' up," Velvette interjected, giving Alastor a slight elbowing. He didn't seem to mind, lowering his hands from his hair to look at her. "Are you and Rosie friends or not? This whole thing has been sketch as fuck."

"We're in Hell, my dear, and we're demons. Nothing is as it seems on face value, and rarely is it what you see when you scratch the surface," Alastor huffed, leaning back and touching his middle as the vehicle pulled onto the road properly and started their drive. "...But, yes. It went well. Rosie is... dangerous, deadly, but that isn't all that she is."

"Would've loved a fight, if I'm honest. But this coat- this REALLY fuckin' swanky coat, by the way- gets to be clean another day. Val, Vel? ...Thanks for... y'know. Stickin' around."

But he furrowed a brow at Alastor.

"Speaking of dangerous and deadly, however... Al, what the fuck?! You could have tried to talk me out of the weird soup! I had spoons of it and it was... ohgod..." He sank back in his seat.

"I can't even begin to describe that eyeball soup..."

"Eww!" Valentino cringed, practically clutching his pearls - Velvette frowned, but was much more unimpressed. Alastor just chuckled.

"And all I had to do was dare you not to sputter, and you ate several bites without fuss! Got a bit green. You're quite lucky that Rosie is a talented cook - there's actually something to appreciate in how gelatinous and unctuous it is."

"Fucking 'unctuous'? Calm down, Julia Child."

"I wondered if you'd have been adventurous to bite into the garnish eyes, too! They pop like grapes when cooked right--"

"EWWWWW, stoooop, I'm gonna throw up. That's gross, like, I can KINDA get eating meat 'cause it's meat but eww. Yuck. Yuck, ciervo," Valentino dramatically objected, getting a fond laugh out of Alastor.

"Waste not, want not!"

Edited 2026-01-11 06:35 (UTC)

Vox groaned again, and quickly fished into his coat pocket for a favored and well-used flask. After screwing off the top, he took a big pull from its contents, if anything to 'settle down' his stomach with a big punch of liquor and wash out the... unctuousness.

The gin will just be for another occasion. He'd probably have vomited before he got the cork out, anyway.

"You're looking at a guy who was forced to eat liver dishes growing up," he replied, voice momentarily raw from the drink, slightly husky. What the fuck did he keep in that flask-

"But I draw the line at eyeballs." He ran the back of his hand against a corner of his mouth.

"I'm ordering out tonight, because I more than earned the sloppiest smash burger after that."

Alastor guffawed at their reactions, tickled pink by the disgust. Velvette rolled her eyes, swiping to another app on her phone.

"The same fuckin' diner AGAIN - Al, I assume you don't want some greaseball, I'll order you something."

"Hahah! No need, my dear - I'll cook for myself. I admit, the eyeballs aren't really my favorite either. I've been having an itch for gumbo, now that I've gotten the right sausages in my fridge," Alastor chuckled. The andouille sausage that Vox had been so gracious to fetch for him was calling his name...! "I'll have plenty if you'd rather try some, dear."

"Oooh, I wanna try. Ciervo can cook, huh~? What a pretty little housewife you make."

"Oh, posh, I just know what I learned from Maman."

Something in his stomach twisted just then as the others spoke, enough to bring Vox to a rather rare quiet. The little whine in his heart of, Wait, I want some, too... dissolved into what became a little drift somewhere far outside of his own body. A skip.

Alastor was laughing. Velvette sat close, but it didn't bother him (that much). Valentino leaned with interest, no ounce of anger in him, and the cabin of the limo was suddenly filled with something that slowly buzzed up Vox's antennae.

These three demons, a fourth (or more) on the way, were the only ones that the creature that was once Vincent Whittman could ever give even half a shit about. Everyone, all in this enclosed space of highly reinforced steel. Safe. ...Thanks to him, of course.

...

Vox shook his head a little. That was a weird feeling just then. He crossed one leg over the other and bobbed the end of his aloft foot, a force of habit when he was deep in thought or on edge.

"Yeah, he uh... cooks like an absolute beast," he added absently.

Then he pulled from the flask again.

If Valentino or Velvette noticed, they didn't make any indication - not like Alastor, who spotted it immediately and acted just as quickly to recapture Vox's attention.

"Certainly better than you do, mister kitchen fire! Astonishing that you had the gall to host a cooking show, hahah!"

It got a snort of amusement from Velvette, a Look from Valentino - but all that mattered to Alastor was making sure the competitive edge grabbed the picturebox by the antennae.

"Why, I'll even let you have a little for managing not to make a scene or getting yourself strangled into a worse Deal!"

"Oh, shit, Vox is in a Deal now?"

"Oh, plenty of them - but in this case, he gets to be the hotelier for the Hazbin Hotel in my absence."

"UGH-- Voxxy, make sure you get Angel's lazy ASS out of there and into the studio when he's being a giant baby about it!"

"Ah-ah-ah! Charlie's whims come first. Hah! Have fun with that."

He startled, and his expression flattened as he twisted the flask's top closed.

"Fuck off- it was the 50's! We were coming off of rationing in World War 2, and convenience was key. The recipes were easy... for... for the people at home who were finally free of the shackles of rationing, okay? My show did real numbers!" Seriously. You can look them up. Hell, he had them stored in his personal files, jackasses!

Ah, there it was- a topic he didn't exactly want to get into right now. Not in the car, anyway... the bobbing stopped and he sighed.

"Look- I'll take Angel Dust's work-life balance into account," he noted gently, and patted Valentino's arm.

"But it's true: Al's on something of a souped-up maternity leave, and the Hotel will simply flounder without him. So, I'm going in to pick up the slack. BUT!" Let's not have any arguments now, hold on-

"That's actually something I had plans for anyway, so this still lines up. I think the redemption thing is complete bullshit, but having connections to the likes of the Morningstars comes with a wealth of perks we can all benefit from." He tucked the flask away and steepled his claws with a distinct, metallic shink.

"I need some time in my office to put together the schematics and a few slides. Next meeting, I'll go over the specifics."

His eyes turned to Alastor.

"That includes you, considering you're essentially a Vee now..."

A brow quirked. "Or would that make us the A-Vees? Rolls off the tongue, but we can workshop it."

Alastor's ears perked up, matching the questioning quirk of a brow. Say what now?

"I'm not part of your little Overlord team," he corrected. With the statement drawing eyes to him, he dropped his ears again, almost reflexively moving his hands to hold his middle protectively. "I may be pregnant, and... raising a child with you, Vox. But that doesn't make me a part of your team."

"Wow, stick up the arse, much? What's the difference?"

"My dear, it's all of the difference - matters of raising the child are deferring to Vox, but I will not surrender my name and reputation to be a part of another person's machinations," he grumbled, fingers tightening over his coat to keep from fidgeting and giving his tell away.

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