divinetree | Mom says it's my turn with the Alastor

Oh, don't mind him, taking a sidestep to get into the beginning of this maze. At his height, these walls were another matter entirely compared to others.

"A reset! Love it! What abooout..."

He snapped his fingers. "Fake walls! Just when they feel they have no avenue left, they watch as a friend tumbles through into a path altogether new!"

"Hahaha! Oh, now with fake walls, we must have it so that they spin around oh so dramatically and lock, separating people - how thrilling! And further in let's add matching pitfalls, send them tumbling into the boiler room!"

He pauses at a wall, deciding that ahh yes, this is the perfect spot for one of the afforementioned false walls. Dragging his claw along the stone, veves and magic flowing in, the wall clicked and shifted subtly in preparation to swivel. If it weren't so damn dark in here, one might see the slight inch or so along the bottom where it was now lifted, but that'd be a reward for anyone being observant!

"They have to spin like a haunted manor's bookcase! Otherwise, what's the point?"

Let's see, what else can he add in? Alastor could handle that first swinging door. Lucifer moved down a path and conjured a piece of chalk in his hand, hunkered down to draw a square.

He stuck his hand in, and it moved through the floor. Good.

...

With a thought, he put down a very large, pumpkin-shaped beanbag down in the chamber below. Nobody should break a leg, and Charlie either never manifested her wings to begin with, or... didn't like using them.

When he continued to draw, he added a few vines and tiny pumpkins, something appropriate, but perhaps a little clue.

"Traps are nice, but what about scares? I was thinking a big fat spider coming down somewhere, but would that piss off Angel Dust, orrr...?"

"If it gets him fiery and mad, all the better! Hah! Why, maybe a little further in we can pull out old Bruce, see if he's interested in taking a few snaps for a fun time."

Gator might be a little much, but sometimes you needed something that was terribly extra.

"Now I wonder if you can make a terrifying duck. A foul fowl! A truly ferocious beast!"

"Ol' Brucey could use the enrichment! So long as nobody's gotta yank anyone from his belly, I think he can come up and play."

He stood. A terrifying duck, eh...? "I'll raise you one malevolent mallard!"

Lucifer conjured a soft red flame flecked in gold. He wound up and pitched it high, had it land behind Alastor. With a cheery POOF, there was a lovely rubber duck in a top hat, beak open in a little smile and an eye closed in a wink. It was the size of a small passenger car, and its wings were spread, very welcoming.

But along the lines of its wings, eyelids twitched and opened, revealing glimmering rubies for eyes. The duck's chest and belly opened in a cross-shaped, segmented maw, revealing multiple rows of needle teeth. Thin, worm-like tongues thrashed with its ensuing indescribable shriek of hunger. The little duck head was a lure.

"...I think I'll call him Carlos."

Oh, that thing was wretched, and in such a delightful way! There'd be no guess whatsoever who made that. Alastor chuckled in delight, patting 'Carlos' on the head before conjuring and tossing a slab of dripping raw meat for the creature to enjoy.

"Splendid. Absolutely wicked. This has me thinking - much further in, after they've gotten so used to the hedges, that's when we should have grasping branches and roots. A bit of thorns in the rosebush just for dear Niffty."

Lucifer laughed as well, proudly leaning upon the cane-staff. Carlos hissed in glee and scrambled over to lean and chow on the offering. "Ahhh, Levi always likes this kind of stuff."

Mhm~ Okay, okay. He's smelling what you're cooking, Bambi. "Gotta throw Niff a bone for sure! Thorns, grasping branches and roots. Gotta have something that'll chase. Carlos has spook factor, but we need something fast, something that'll get the adrenaline pumping..."

He drummed his fingers. Then, his eureka moment came with a literal lightbulb.

"Gargoyles! They never go out of style. They perch on the tops of the walls at certain points. Most are just decorative, but soooome..." He snagged up his cane and raised it like a bat, swung and sent a spray of red and gold sparkle. Popping into place are sneering, bat-like creatures that leered and snarled from their perch.

The king strolled along, and gave each one a hearty tap. "Duck... duck... duck... duck..."

The second to last in his lineup, however, roared and lunged, and took him down in a blink.

Ahh, a perfect cartoonish performance! Alastor started cackling, already picturing Husker or Angel getting squashed under a gargoyle and cursing in terrorized anger - and the mental image gets him laughing even harder than Lucifer getting squashed in and of itself already had him cracking up.

"Perfect! Bravo! Truly a terrible sight, an excellent beast, I adore this wretched stone monster," the Demon cooed, scratching at the stone neck of the critter as he waited for Lucifer to stand again. "Let's pick a good stretch of the maze with a straight path, and add some nice, slippery puddles to make the chase even more terrifying!"

The creature stood and swaggled its head proudly with the compliments, and only as an afterthought got up and off the king, who remained in his spot on the floor, quite ruffled up.

"SliPpeRy pUddLes..." That was agreement. Maybe. Kind of.

"This... this is the end of the line... for me, Alastor... I am slain..."

Alastor, ever-grinning, crouched down and marveled at his comedically squashed king.

"Alas, poor Yorrick! I'm certain your funeral will be beautiful. A roasted duck for every mourner. All of the mourners in blinding, ghostly white in your honor, huddled under their acid-proof umbrellas as even the skies weep for your loss. Shall I bury your ducks with you, dear Lucifer? Adorn them in tiny caskets, nail tiny sickles over their necks to assure they don't rise from the dead in vengeance?"

"Bury me with my ducks... a gift for the river crossing... or to bear me over Styx..."

He shakily raised an arm. "I have but one... final request. If... if nothing else..."

A soft gasp of breath. The drama. "A kiss..."

"A kiss, you say...! It would be such a sweet, parting sorrow... do I have your blessing to eat your heart, darling? You've promised it to me, after all, I swear I'll eat it beautifully raw, most respectful," Alastor cooed in delight, gently rolling his 'squashed' companion onto his back, playfully walking his fingers up Lucifer's chest.

He was like a limp noodle, now on his back. But as he lay his head back, opening the way to chest and throat, he gave his final decree:

"I trust no other to such a prize...! Just..."

A pathetic little cough-

"Pair it... with an appropriate wine..."

"There's no wine so sweet as you, my dear," Alastor chuckled, giving Lucifer a gentle kiss to his deathly quivering lips. Gentle, soft, a sad farewell...!!

Leaning back, Alastor clapped, summoning a large and viciously sharp knife, already glowing with green veves.

"Now then. I ought to get that first bite while your heart still beats for me~"

Really, he could have just asked for a kiss, but the roleplay just made it fun. Yet to see him draw up that knife, a small bead of sweat popped onto the brow.

Uhh... they're- they're still just playing, right?

Funsies? A game? Al...? ...Sweetie...?

"Now, hold still~♥ I'll make it quick."

Making a show of it, Alastor gave the knife a playful twirl in his hands before quickly plunging it right into Lucifer's chest...!!!

...In lieu of any piercing agony was instead a harmless smack, the knife revealed to be a fistful of wilted flowers.

Maybe he'd break the knife. Maybe in some fashion it would hurt, and he waaaasn't great when it came to pain-

The knife glinted and his heart raced. The plunge had him shut his eyes tight and wait for the worst-

Smack.

...

One eye opened a crack. Then the other. Flowers.

After a pause, he wheezed into a fit of laughter. "You...! You-! Are-! A-! Bastard!"

That wheezing laughter was always so grating in the beginning, but it's got such a delightful glint to it for Alastor, now. His king wears his heart too much on his sleeve... but, perhaps it doesn't matter, once one is as powerful as Lucifer.

The flowers crinkle and crumble, already long dead since Alastor had grasped them, but it only added to the humor. The Sinner chuckled, enjoying the shock and delight.

And relishing the fact that Lucifer was about to just let Alastor stab him. Silly, trusting fool. Fondness makes him so weak.

"How did you guess~?"

"I think it was right around the time you started swingin' that thing down that gave me the epiphany...!" He made a vague stabbing motion with a hand as he worked to catch his breath.

"But you weren't the first knife I've come across!" He sat up then, and reached for the flowers, grasped the stems above Alastor's hands. Gradually, he defied their fate and wound the clock back as a soft white light blossomed. Dried, heavily-ailed blooms seemed to take a renewed breath and perk back up. They smelled as if warmed by a bright summer's day and were begging for the honeybees to visit.

"...And as thanks for not prematurely snatching out my heart, have a little something. Put it on my bill." He urged the flowers back in his direction. They always seemed to wilt whenever he touched them, likely a product of his own curse.

"Oh, don't feel too safe just yet - don't you find it romantic that I want to consume you and make you forever a part of me~?" Alastor teased. Rather than killing the flowers again, Alastor tugged open his chest pocket, giving Lucifer a place to tuck the flowers again rather than in his hand.

"Plus, it keeps you on your toes~. Makes things a little more exciting!"

"Oh, fiiine~ If you must have the ego stroke: That you want my heart as much as you do makes this brie real happy."

He gently tucked the flowers away. He really does express himself in a very macabre manner. He's a fucking freak but he's a damn interesting freak.

Lucifer raised a finger. "...Say... what about a mock-up of a sacrificial rite somewhere in the maze that captured maze-goers have a chance to wind up in if caught by some sort of spooky pursuer? Make this whole thing part 'haunted house'?"

"Oh, indeed! Or perhaps it'd be fun to set up little ritual shrines... see what the frustrated, desperate little residents will do for a boon or a hint," Alastor chuckled fondly, bringing them both to their feet again and gently brushing dust and rubble off of Lucifer's shoulders.

"How many will think to place a feather as tribute? How many will desperately spill blood? Oh, riveting!"

Brought to his feet, he submitted to the dusting. His wings emerged, poofed, and he briefly shook them to rouse and help clear off the rest.

"Now that is going to be on my mind when this thing kicks off! But who to pursue them...?" He rubbed his chin.

"A robed, faceless figure that seems to glide across the ground...? Something that can melt into shadows~" He wiggled his fingers.

"My specialty~!" Alastor sang in amusement, clapping to summon one of his impish puppets. Don the little fellow with a dramatic cloak. "Hear that, my friend? Your job is to chase. No maiming! ....Maaaybe a bit of nibbling. They're Sinners, they'll be fine."

...That. That little fella was adorable.

"I appreciate that fella's enthusiasm and spunk, but he's a little... cute, isn't he?"

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